a crucifix on our heart and hands
by Aiko Isari
Summary: You don't have to see someone die to know when they are on the inside, even if it's just a little. Part of 'our infinity'.


Takeru is young, but he's not a fool. He's sensitive, he's aware.

From picking up the egg from the earth, he knows Patamon is different from the others. It's not just because he's small and fragile and helpless-

-like him, the nostalgia hurts and he's not all _that_ safe-

though that helps a lot. It's because his eyes are clear and aware and helpless, but he adores Takeru already, it's clear. He can't help but be sure of that. He pets the slime and giggles with delight when it doesn't leave residue on his palms.

The other digimon are looking at him like he's either food or strange and neither are very nice if he's going to be honest. It's probably why his brother looks so unhappy. Then again, has Takeru known him to be happy these days?

He likes these monsters. They seem very kind beneath their scars and pain. Just like his brother, like Taichi-san, who can't see very well from an explosion he went through.

But he wants to know more, wants to see more. There has to be more to this world than the scarred island they were stuck on.

Or this desert. None of them were prepared for a desert. His long sleeves are helping, but his helmet doesn't do much for his face. The digimon aren't much better, but they act tough, rather like adults.

Taichi just puts his goggles on and keeps walking ahead. He'd run if he could, but the sand (and Agumon, the sensible one) slows him down. Their Digivices had scared him, scared them, with a horrible sobbing noise.

Takeru, ever curious, and with a Tokomon (he doesn't know if he's adequate protection or not but he wants to go), goes on during the night. He forgets his own brother for a while. He can't help himself. More than Koushiro, more than anyone, he thinks, he wants to know.

That voice sounded very said, he remembers, like his mama's when she thought he was sleeping, and his father's whenever Yamato and Takeru come to visit. His brother's accusation is strong and loud even without words which is when he looks the most like their daddy. Takeru ignores it every time.

He ignores the admonishments in his head, they sound way too much like his brother, and keeps walking.

* * *

The end of the desert takes him to a place just as empty. It's a carnival like the ones he sees on television that his mother rarely takes them to. There's no food and no fun though. So he keeps walking. What else does he have, really? The others are probably looking for him by now. He almost regrets leaving. They would have made it here eventually.

Still, Takeru's feet push onward. Tokomon sleeps on his head. Tokomon is a nice friend. He never questions anything. He simply trusts. Takeru knows that's bad sometimes, but when you're always questioning yourself, it should be okay, right?

Right?

He keep walking until Tokomon stills. His normally loose, slime body tenses up, little paws bunched up. For the first time, Takeru can hear all of the Digimon's large teeth grinding together.

Takeru is a child, often curious and eager to have new, happy experiences. That said, he's not a fool. So when Tokomon gets uncomfortable, he turns around.

Yellow eyes peer right into his face.

Like anyone else who has had to see that sort of thing up close, Takeru jumps and yelps, turning on his heels and making to bolt. Tokomon is dislodged from his head in the process but he doesn't seem concerned. He lands on his feet, ears straightened and large teeth bared.

To his credit, the creature with yellow eyes (he looks like a very round bat, Takeru thinks, except with eyes. Eyes that work. That doesn't seem right.) looks just as surprised. They fly back and nearly hit a pole.

Tokomon only growls with what is probably triumph, but Takeru runs over. "Are you okay?"

(his big heart is his weakness, he knows, he knows)

The digimon groans, rubbing the top of his whole body with his wings. "Yeah… I think so." He blinks. "A human!" The realization is slow for the seconds it take to voice it. "You're a human! And you're alive!" There's an odd delight in his tone at those words, an unmistakable glee that would be childlike if it didn't seem a little cold as well. Rather calculating even, like the eyes of a hungry animal.

Slowly, Takeru backs up, on the pretense of giving the little guy some space to fly again, but in reality he just wants to be able to run. He's been bullied, he knows how important space is, how important hiding is. He is not a fighter, and he knows this.

Tokomon judging by the little guy's still bared teeth, is the opposite. He's aware of that for the first time.

The digimon seems to be trying to ignore it. Judging by the way the catlike eyes keep glancing over, he isn't doing so well. But he's probably stronger so why is he afraid?

Takeru feels the odd silence trying to swallow him whole. He shakes his head to unclog it. "Yeah! I am." He doesn't have any weird Digimon appendages, does he? "Why?"

The Digimon's flapping becomes eagerly fast, too eager. He's getting so many bad feelings right now. "There haven't been humans here in _centuries_!" he says, eyes going starry. "They're only in stories! Diplomats of the golden dragon, the partners of _gods_! The gods are only there because of their partners or so the stories say! And now there's another human! Alive! Did you see any of them in your world?"

Takeru blinks. "No?" That seems like a weird question. Would this Digimon know others from the many Digimon in his world? "I don't know what they look like."

The giant bat frowns. "Oh yeah… you humans don't look alike, I forget. Digimon are like that too!"

How? He wonders. Takeru tilts his head. "I'm Takeru!" Well, there's no way to go but forward.

"Hello, Takeru," the Digimon says. "I'm PicoDevimon." He smiles a bit too widely again. "Nice to meet ya!"

He smiles again and Takeru, for reasons he doesn't understand, feels like crying.

Then, all too fast, the little creature explodes. It's without smoke or flame, but it's an explosion all the same, and there's a white cat backing away from him, staring like a sniper at where the Digimon once had been.

Now, Takeru cries.

* * *

 _ **A/N:**_ Welcome to 'our infinity', where no one is safe. Hehe, please leave a review!

 **Challenge:** Diversity Writing (Digimon) C46. write in present tense, Ultimate Sleuth 0.2 - write about the effects of curiosity, Valentine's Advent day 25. write about the consequences of a character's actions.


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